Advertisements
Archive | Humor RSS for this section
August 22, 2019  

Another Undeniably Sri Lankan Elephant — You Can Always Tell By Where Their Trunk Is.

by Anura Guruge

Click to ENLARGE 

There is a video that goes with this picture. Click image to access my post with video.

There Are Indian Elephants, And There Are African Elephants — But You Can Always Spot A Sri Lankan Elephant.As soon as I saw the video I knew immediately, and incontrovertibly, that this HAD to be a Sri Lankan elephant.

They take after their owners. What can I say. You can always spot Sri Lankan men too. Luckily, for women around the World they don’t have trunk growing out of their heads. [You might want to think about that.]

I will, of course, do my best to bring you more examples of Sri Lankan elephants doing what comes naturally to them.

For MANY Related Posts:
Search ‘elephants’.
Check Category ‘Sri Lanka’.

by Anura Guruge

Advertisements
August 21, 2019  

Are Moroccans Noted For Their Luxuriant Hair? Just Wondering. ‘Sauve’ Makes This Moroccan Product Line.

by Anura Guruge

Click to ENLARGE.

A Moroccan crowd. They are always wearing ‘hats’!

I bought one of these Suave Moroccan products at Walmart yesterday — based purely on price.

Then this morning when I was using it I got thinking about Moroccans and their hair. I have never been Morocco, but I have to Tunisia, which is pretty adjacent and I have seen enough pictures of Moroccans. I do not recall thinking ‘Wow! They have nice hair’. Most of the time they got their heads covered — both sexes.

Now, I am confused. I feel duped. Do they really have better hair than I?

Related posts:
Check Category ‘Humor’.

by Anura Guruge

August 21, 2019  

“The GURUGE Expeditionary Force” To Acquire Greenland For Trump — Come, Join & DONATE.

by Anura Guruge

Click to ENLARGE.

Too much talk. Time for action.

Time for man’s man, i.e., I, to step into the breech and get this done.

OK.

I am a Pacifist.

So, it will be different. But, no problems.

I am, definitely, NOT the Master of the Deal.

I am THE MASTER, OF THE MASTER, OF THE MASTER, OF THE MASTER, OF THE MASTER, OF THE MASTER, OF THE MASTER … of THE DEAL.

I am GOOD. Real GOOD. The BEST. Actually better than BEST.

I made a v. comfortable living for 22-years selling MYSELF. Yes, it was professional prostitution. I sold myself for money — yep, basically same rates as a good escort. So, I can sell. I can get the deal done.

Plus …. a secret. Don’t tell anyone. I used to joke about this.

In those 22-years, I never lost a sale (of myself) if the decision maker was female. What can I say. SMILE. Yes, I SMILE. I do NOT SCOWL. So, how can I lose. At least 50% of the folks we met in Greenland — I hope — will be female. SMILE. We are all set. SMILE.

Oh. I am also Mr. Chocolate. I am made of chocolate. I am going to need lots, lots, lots of chocolates. Maybe a few hundred tons.

Plus, roses and nylons.

This means I am going to need MONEY. Lots of money. Not millions. But, billions. But, we can do this. For Trump.

So, start sending money, NOW for the “The GURUGE Expeditionary Force” To Acquire Greenland For Trump.

This is important. No messing around. Send money. Send LOTS of money.

My PayPal account is the same as my e-mail. And my e-mail is easy to find.

Send Money.

“The GURUGE Expeditionary Force” To Acquire Greenland For Trump.

Send Money, please.

“The GURUGE Expeditionary Force” To Acquire Greenland For Trump.

When I have got enough chocolate, roses and nylons I will let you KNOW. Promise. Plus, I will need a few other things, of course. A private jet to get me there, for one. I will also need some new threads. So, send money. Send money.

“The GURUGE Expeditionary Force” To Acquire Greenland For Trump.

Related posts:
Search ‘Trump’.

by Anura Guruge

August 19, 2019  

Instant Karma: World’s First Porsche Fails To Sell At Auction Because Of Bad English?

by Anura Guruge

Click to access ‘MarketWatch’ story.

Classic.

A German car and a Dutch auctioneer. I know the Dutch have a long, storied history when it comes to auctioneering BUT how do you end up with one that even his OWN PEOPLE can’t understand.

This was a multi-million dollar question. Nobody at Sotheby’s was paying attention? This is crazy.

But, I class it as ‘Instant Karma‘. German cars give you that. Trust me on this.

Related Posts:
Search ‘German cars’.

by Anura Guruge

August 16, 2019  

Donald Trump Is NOT Acting Presidential; Why Think Of Buying Greenland When He Can INVADE Denmark?

by Anura Guruge

He still does NOT get it.

He continues to act as real estate tycoon rather than as President of the U.S. of A. — the mightiest military power in the known Universe.

What is this craziness? He wants Greenland. Go get Greenland.

How difficult would it be to conquer Denmark?

How long will it take. 7 minutes, 8 minutes?

Just two phone calls. One to the Pentagon and the other to the (other Queen) — the Queen of Denmark. Surrender or our bombers will be above in 5-minutes.

Come on.

This would be better than ANY military parade.

It will be like Mrs. Thatcher and the Falklands Armada.

He will be THE HERO. 2020 in the BAG and they will be BEGGING him to stay on as Emperor for Life.

This is so simple.

Denmark is a LOVELY country. Beautiful people. I have visited many times. I have even driven across it … in a Triumph TR7 convertible.

The Danes would LOVE to be Americans. Their ancestors tried to cross the Atlantic. Now Donald will makes their dreams come true.

So, come on. Go invade Denmark.

Just think of the possibilities next.

Iceland?

Britain?

Related posts:
Search ‘Trump’.

by Anura Guruge

August 12, 2019  

Do NOT Get Your Son A Kraut BMW IF He Is SMART Enough To Want A JAGUAR.

by Anura Guruge

Click image to access the U.K. ‘Daily Mail’ story.

The video that accompanies story.

Use above link to see the video.

This is BRILLIANT!

Made my day.

I am SO, SO, SO PROUD of this young man. He is going to go far. He has discernment, courage and chutzpah.

I would be PROUD to have him as a son, though I would NEVER, EVER insult my kids by buying them a lousy German car, even if I had to sell a kidney to buy a Jaguar.

Jaguar should give this young man a new car for FREE. This was quite the statement.

Way to go.

It does NOT happen often, but every once in awhile an Indian shows that they have tremendous good tastes.

Related Posts:
Search ‘German cars’.

by Anura Guruge

July 22, 2019  

Rhode Island (R.I.) Motorists INGENIOUSLY Registering Cars At An Empty Field In Maine To Avoid Fines!

by Anura Guruge

Click to access the ‘Boston Globe’ original.

The sheer damn INGENUITY of humans — and their innate nature to be deceive — never ceases to amaze me.

What is mind boggling here is that they can get away with it in Maine. Basically means that the Maine folks do not realize that the address is that of an empty field and that ‘100’ cars are registered against that address.

You have to read the story.

NO can DO in strict, law-abiding (Live Free Or Die) New Hampshire. To avoid out-of-staters (i.e., flatlanders) from abusing the system, we the residents have to jump through hoops to register cars. Have to show proof of residence, electricity bills etc. etc.

This is wild.

But, you have to hand it to them. Damn clever. I take my hat off.

Related posts:
Search ‘Maine’.

by Anura Guruge

« Older Posts
%d bloggers like this: