Best Ever Easter Joke. [Non-Religious]
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by Anura Guruge
Related posts:
‡ ‡ ‡ ‡ Search for ‘Easter‘
or check CATEGORY ‘Holidays‘ on Sidebar for many other posts >>>>
A couple having gone shopping in town the eve of Easter Sunday are driving back home, at dusk, down a country road.
Suddenly they feel and hear a THUMP. They realize that they must have hit something. They gingerly get out of the car and walk to the front.
They find, to their utter distress, that they have hit a large bunny who had been carrying a basket of eggs and now the eggs were all over the place.
It takes them a second and then it dawns on them … they have hit the Easter Bunny!
The bunny looks in bad shape. They think they might have killed him. They start having visions of the ‘Grinch that Stole Christmas’ except this is Easter.
Suddenly the wife has an idea. She hurries to the back of the car and start rummaging through her shopping.
She finds a large aerosol can and comes back with it.
She starts spraying the motionless bunny, lying on the road, eggs scattered all over the place, with her can.
Suddenly the bunny starts to twitch and move around. Its right arm begins to jerk. It wakes up. Looks around. The right arm now starts waving.
The couple stand, agape, speechless. The bunny is looking at them, a slow smile spreading across his face. He is waving.
He slowly gets up. The couple get nervous. This is the Easter Bunny and they had nearly killed it. They scurry back to their seats, start the car and take off before the bunny starts asking them any questions.
They nervously glance back to see if the bunny is OK. He appears to be fine. He is waving like crazy. He doesn’t stop waving.
The husband says: “That was amazing. What did you do and why is he waving, non-stop?”
She replies: “I don’t know. Let me look”.
She starts reading what it says on the aerosol can that she had used to revive the bunny.
She goes: “Ah. This must be it. It says: Restores life to hair and gives it permanent wave“.
Boom. Boom.
<< Come On. That is good. Trust me. Try it this weekend. >>
You got it right. Pun on ‘hair’ ….
>> Second Best Ever Easter Joke <<
Ironic & Sad That The Ukrainian Jewish Registration Claim Is Occurring When Pope John XXIII Is To Be Canonized.
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by Anura Guruge
Related posts:
>> John XXIII at Taylor Community — Apr. 13, 2013.
>> John XXIII in Alton — Apr. 5, 2014.
† † † † Search on ‘John’ or ‘canonization’ for many other related posts >>>>
I was mortified to hear about this yesterday.
I first thought my ears were deceiving me.
How could this be happening AGAIN?
As a papal historian I know how many times
it happened before.
Today’s claim that it was a hoax is better news,
though I am not sure.
This pope, Good Pope John XXIII, as a person, before becoming Pope and during his papacy did more for Jews than any other modern pope — in my opinion, and I include John Paul II (#265).
This was the pope who told the Jewish community: “I am Joseph your brother“ his original middle name having been “Giuseppe” (Joseph in Italian).
Here is one of my slides from the Pope John XXIII Canonization Presentation that goes with the “Pope John XXIII: 101 Facts & Trivia” book. It highlights the crucial “Operation Baptism“, which did NOT involve any baptisms or even a commitment for baptism, which saved thousands of Jews during World War II.
Per the Catholic tradition Saints, and that is what Canonization is all about, are already in heaven, sitting with God keeping an eye on the folks down below. If so, I wonder what John XXIII is thinking right now?
Have A Contemplative Good Friday Ahead Of “Happy Easter” On Sunday.
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by Anura Guruge
Related posts:
‡ ‡ ‡ ‡ Search for ‘Easter‘
or check CATEGORY ‘Holidays‘ on Sidebar for many other posts >>>>
When I started to make a concerted attempt to try and understand all of the (and they do have a lot) Jewish holidays I quickly realized that our Pavlovian “HAPPY << name of holiday >>” is not appropriate for all holidays.
Though I am but a reformed, born-again heathen as a papal historian (cum author) and British cathedral connoisseur I do fully understand and appreciate all the nuances of Easter. Plus as with Christmas I have celebrated Easter, with abandonment, all my life.
I am from the school that maintains that ‘Good’ is by NO MEANS the right word for this, the Easter, Friday. Some of the older terms, especially BLACK Friday, are more appropriate — some of the others having been: Holy Friday, Great Friday and Easter Friday.
So, forgive me, IF I don’t wish you a “Happy Easter” today. I will do that on the right day — Sunday.
Yes, I am all set for Easter. Teischan, last Monday, made sure that I would not forget — as if I have ever forgotten a holiday. I live for holidays — a legacy of growing up in Ceylon in the 1960s when, on average, we had a holiday at least once a month, some say every 18 days (if you count the monthly Full Moon, which was for a time a holiday each month). I went shopping on Wednesday: Toy-R-Us, Dollar Store and Walmart. Still need to get more eggs, real ones, for the egg hunt. Ham is thawing. In Ceylon, where I celebrated Easter with my Baptist, lawyer surrogate-father, we would have the finest, imported New Zealand lamb for Easter.
The word ‘Easter’ itself has nothing to do with the Christian holiday, in much the same way that Christmas came about from a pagan Winter Solstice holiday. The name ‘Easter’ comes from the name of an old Anglo-Saxon ‘Spring’ (re-birth) goddess, Ēostre. Yes, it was an old Spring holiday.
All that may be, lets wait until Sunday for the “Happy” part.
Got me thinking again. I am sure that at least 60% of young Americans will not be able to tell you what Easter is all about. I remember seeing a news story about it. Maybe I can find another story, from this year, on this intriguing topic — Americans having no idea as to what Easter signifies.
I Took A Sledgehammer To Cisco Linksys RE1000 Wireless-N Range Extender. See The Pictures. I Wrote Review On Amazon.
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by Anura Guruge
Related Posts:
>> Cisco Linksys Sales will LIE — Apr. 17, 2014.
>> Linksys brain-dead as well — Apr. 18, 2014.
**** Search ‘Linksys‘ and ‘Cisco‘ for other posts >>>>

Click to EXPAND. Already up on Amazon. Amazon put it up within 5 minutes. Amazon knows me. Linksys doesn’t.

Cisco Linksys RE1000 Wireless-N Range Extender and my 12 (or 16) pound sledgehammer which I use to split logs. Click to ENLARGE.

Cisco Linksys RE1000 Wireless-N Range Extender getting the treatment it deserves. Piece of junk. Click to ENLARGE.

The plastic was more robust than the Firmware ever was. It broke but not into the little pieces I hoped. It was very satisfying. Click to ENLARGE.
These pictures tell you all that you need to know.
RE1000 — stay away, unless you want to smash it with a sledgehammer.
That was cathartic. Deanna was cracking up. Kids loved it.
Cisco Linksys (Belkin) Sales & Support At 877-959-7467: Not Just Duplicitous, Brain Dead As Well. Wow. Impressive.
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by Anura Guruge
Related Posts:
>> Cisco Linksys Sales will LIE — Apr. 17, 2014.
**** Search ‘Linksys‘ and ‘Cisco‘ for other posts >>>>
I haven’t really worked out how or why but my posts somehow tend to get noticed on the Web.
I posted my rant about being lied to and scammed by Linksys around 5pm on Thursday.
Just past 8pm, just as I was getting ready for dinner, the phone rang. I answered it. It was a lady that sounded oriental. [No, she was not Indian.]
Identified herself as being from Linksys support! Wow. Told me that she had had a call from her Social Media folks who had told her to call me. I was impressed.
Appears that they were trying to contact me on Twitter too.
Well, I was patient. I gave her my order number. She found the order. She found the charge for $19.99.
I even explained that I did NOT want all of the $19.99 refunded. Explained, talking very slowly, that ALL I wanted was $14.99 — and that I was happy to pay the $5 as I had been led to believe.
She put me on hold! That was the third time that these clowns had put me on hold re. this refund. My call earlier in the day having been put on hold TWICE.
She comes back and then gives me the same spiel that I had had earlier in the day!
Basically that she can’t give me the refund!
I hate to say bad things about women. I like to give them the benefit of the doubt. Much happier to call men stupid. I am, however, forced to make an exception in this case. This woman was BEYOND THE PALE. She, bless her soul, had no clue. Could not get her to understand that the issue was that I had been told, TWICE (possibly three times), ON A RECORDED LINE, that the support was $5.
So the issue was that I was lied to. She was going to put me on hold again.
No, I wasn’t going to go through that dance again. For a start I wanted to eat. I told her to listen to the bloody tape.
Isn’t that why these calls are taped. Possibly that they say they tape BUT they don’t really. That would be ironic. All I want is for a Linksys VP to listen to the tape. They can even keep their ill begotten $17.99. If they are that desperate take it. I will get it back at the other end as a Cisco shareholder. I think they owe me a order of magnitude more right now in dividends. I think next Friday.
But, I have had it with Linksys. I was for 15 years a D-Linkman. We pioneered home Wi-Fi together c. 2001. I liked D-Link. D-Link never lied to me. I only went with Linksys because TDS recommended Linksys over D-Link. I bought the Linksys RE-2000, over the phone, without reading any of the Amazon reviews. It is pretty badly slammed on Amazon. So looks like I am in for more ‘fun’. Damn. I took a sledgehammer to my Linksys this evening! Yes, I have pictures. I will post.
Tomorrow (actually today since it is past midnight) I am going to do two things. I am going to e-mail John Chambers. He will remember me! All I will have to say is ‘Nashoba Networks‘ and he will go pale! Maybe I shouldn’t complain. What is $14.99 compared to the $100 million John payed for Nashoba. Maybe this is payback. I am laughing. Well we had fun. I am, however, going to report this to the Better Business Bureau (BBB). I have had great luck with them, e.g., DirecTV outfit that lied to me.